I’ve read articles in the type of parenting magazine I favor that ask the question, “Why do people always want to know if the baby is a boy or a girl?” They wonder what difference it makes. And go on to say that from the moment the person gets their answer, it changes how they interact with the baby.
But so what? Does that have to be a bad thing?
Sure, girls and boys are different. And some of that is nature, some nurture, dependent upon the culture.
But does it have to be so terrible to think of our boys one way and our girls another?
I have my third male cat. I always think of my male cats as somewhere between baby and boyfriend. Sometimes it’s all about the cuddling and other times a good smooch is called for. So does it really make any difference that the cat is male? I feel more flat towards my girl cats. It’s probably all in my head. There is probably no difference. But so what? I have loved these three mini-boyfriend/babies and will likely continue my love affairs with male cats for the rest of my life.
I also love that my girls are, well, girlie. Did I make them that way? Who knows. I grew up in a house with no mom after I was 6. And she was never girlie in the first place. Yet I have always been distinctly girlie. My younger girl has a lot of qualities typically consider masculine. And yet she will not wear pants nor shorts. No way. She just came that way. And she is actually shaping up to be quite girlie. Just because. So what’s so wrong with getting her a super pretty dress?
Actually, my girls are just people. I know my older daughter is highly sensitive, like me, and both my non-HS husband and I have always been much gentler with her. It doesn’t take much for her to get the message. My little one sometimes needs a bit more to even get her attention. If she were a boy, people would assume the different treatment was based on that, but really, it’s just based upon her personality and what seems to work.